Category: the Rant Board
ok, so I just got done reading a profile here on zone(don't worry all, if it was you I would have PQNed you by now)
so anyways, I helped this user out during the summer. She has gone through a couple of guys already. and she was really sad because of her first. she told me that no other was like him. and then she sed that she didn't want a boyfriend for a long time. I didn't think she would lie to me and go and find one so soon. I helped her(or so I thought) and when I red a cirtain part of her profile, it made me think that what I had sed really didn't help her at all.
ok, I'm done. I'm sure this feeling will pass in time.
thanks for reading about my day
no problem.
Not make a whole lot
of sence
THEN again that no a matter
I mean like "Hi!" {smiles}
here in my location {undisclosed} it is 'bout 3:40 AM.
you take real good care.
Don't worry ~ Be happy.
Health
Wellness
well fair nyob zoo ..say hi to Kai/Wraith for me,
If not able, it ok. message center here Boards.
~*Thunderous MidNight*~
3:41 AM
I don't know if it's any help, but at least you can take pride in the fact that you tried to help.
Think about it this way, by giving vent to your feelings, someone else will in time see this post and say "I feel the same way" and post to this topic, which will bring it back to the top for others to read and agree with, or disagree with, and you'll be saying "yeah, I felt that way, and now I don't."
Anyway, end of flights of fantasy.
Bob
sounds like you are a bit jellous that you arn't the one with this particular girl
but if thats not the case well then just moove on knowing that at least you tried to help i guess
and if she is a close friend to you if you can tell that she is happy with whoever it is that she is with then thats all that really matters ha?
the end
yup exactly. No, I don't want her. You guys were rite, at least I tried to help and that's what really matters.
laters
Raymond
Raymond,
Good to know you are working through this relationship situation in your life..
and to bob,
Not at all certain as to yor commenting of, "end of flights of fantasy," for then truly what a life less than truly fulfilment found..
Well, that my personal opinion, if you think otherwize, so be it. Not a hard feeling here towards you Bob.
~*Thunderous MidNight*~
You know what I've noticed, Raymond. People in general don't want help/advice. They think they do but really, they just want the attention and the knowledge that someone is taking the time to listen to their problems. I've taken a lot of time to listen to people's sob stories of the day and in the past, when they have asked me what they should do, I've given them my advice and it turns out everything I said went in one ear and out the other. Sometimes, they've even gotten mad at the advice I gave when they themselves asked me to be straight with them. It's quite stupid really. I'm not saying that I'm not like this. I am. I don't like to take advice from people cause I generally like to figure things out on my own. However, I do not get mad at people who I spacifically asked to be honest with me when I didn't like what they said. So now, when I get the question of "What should I do?" I ask them what they think they should do and help them figure things out from there. I've also learned to be a bit detached from my friend's problems. Especially relationship problems. Cause no matter how angry they are with each other, they will be quicker to shoot the middle woman. It's not like I don't care cause I really do. I just don't get all worked up like I used to. lol It makes life easier to bare.
A friend of mine is having relationship problems and her boyfriend is rumored to be cheating on her. He's got no job and expects her to cook for him all the time when she gets home from work. He steals money from her, does drugs, and has tried choking her a couple of times. She asked me what I thought she should do and of course my first reaction was to tell her to get the hell away from him and call the cops so they can arrest his ass. But I knew it wouldn't help cause the big question here is if she loves him or not despite all he's done. Cause if she's able to leave him completely and not go back to him then it would be advisable for her to leave him rather than running back and forth to him. I only hope she can sort out her feelings soon; as I have mine.
Well I know this was a bit like giving advice so you can take it or not. But this is how I live my life now cause it's less drama and I'm much happier for it.
Good luck.
Michelle
hmm, thank you Michelle
It's good to help people out but remember, you can't help everybody.
you know? THere are all kinds of people. The ones who want atentin, the ones that really do apreciate your help and the ones that think they are so good with dealing with their life situations by themselves that they hide their feelings and then live unhappily, trying to find better wellbeing on other things. What has aided me through a lot of my downfalls lately is music. When ijust sit there and listen to it or playit, ETC. it makes all of my problems banish. In this case it sounds like this girl wanted more atention. Usually they are one of these people who unfortunately did not have all the friendship they needed, but then again you cannot just go out with someone, break up and then go out with someone, and so on; the purpose of a relationship in my humble opinion is to enjoy each other's company and everything else that you have to offer to each other. I have helped a lot of people and often they have done a lot of things which deceive me so I know exactly how you are feeling. That also might explain though, how is it that sometimes people can be generous to you for no aparent reason. I guess, as some say, what goes around comes around.
To: AZN_guy (#5229)
Sent: Thursday, 25-Oct-2007 13:37:49
Subject: hello
Well, I know you and other people gave me different advices over the summer regarding that matter, but what am I supposed to do, continue to linger on the whole situation, and think about it over and over again until I stop trusting? I've given myself enough time, two long years and a couple of months spent being single before I even considered dating again. I spent all those time building myself and concentrating more important things instead of thinking how much it used to hurt before. The past does not mean that I’ll always be in that condition of feeling sad. I think that its just all about the way a person thinks and deals with a situation. Just be honest with me if you are mad or irritated at me, and I will not take it against you. I know that you might be thinking that I never listened to your advices, or you must be thinking that I lied to you when I said that I don’t want a boyfriend anymore. I was saying that because I was in a bad situation. I still remembered the day we talked about that. Now, if you think I lied to you. “I’m sorry, but that was how I felt back then, I already changed.” Raymond, I can’t keep on thinking about the past, it will just pull me down. I just gave myself a chance to move on and be happy again. If you are mad at me just be honest with me, I will not be mad at you.
Continuation
For those people who said that, “people only tell others about their problems just to get attention.” Well, that statement is not true because different people tell their friends about different problems for different reasons. Not all problems are easily solved overnight. Some problems take awhile to figure out. Giving someone an advice means that your just trying to help the person, but it does not guarantee that a person should or would listen to you. You also need to remember to be straightforward with the person when your irritated or mad at them. Instead of posting something like this on the rant board why don’t you tell the person directly, why don’t you tell me what you wrote here straight?
This is for everyone If you got something to say to someone, then tell them about the whole thing, don’t use a rant board, don’t use other people to tell that person, don’t prolong the situation by not responding, and most importantly don’t lie just to pretend that things are going well.
“I d rather know the sad truth than to be lied to by not responding or by saying something positive to cover things up something.
Shit, this is one of the reasons I stopped logging in this site two years ago. First, I hate liars. Secon, people make a big deal out of everything. I don't give a damn what anyone thinks about me. I'm done with this site.
And yeah, Raymond you overreacted. I wish you thought about things first before you went on rambling about your thoughts. Sorry to say this but posting on a public board about what bothers you is so immature.
damn Casandra...I'm just glad you and Izzie are together and your goin strong! Don't friggin let anyone on this friggin site mess you guys up. Fuck what anyone has to say, cuz in the end it's all you 2. Plus, you guys are just soooo cute together!..hugs to both of you, much love
J
Wow! Why did I ever get involved! lol I still think people tell others about their problems just to get attention because what is listening but giving that person your attention? And a rant is just that;telling how you feel. Raymond never specified who he was talking about in his first post and I personally didn't even know it was you until you posted that e-mail you sent him publicly. No offense but by doing that, you made yourself look even more immature. But I do know a bit about your history and wish you the best of luck with your new relationship.
Michelle
Yes, your probably right. I should have not written here. I just want people to be more straightforward with whatever they want to tell me instead of using a rant board. That’s all.
ok all, just wanted to let ya know that it's all been taken care of. I guess it was just a miss understanding is all. But, I will take your advice that you all gave me on this bord. I mean, it wasn't writtin there just to be forgotten. thanks to you all.
Raymond
Yeah, we've already talked about it. You see, this is what happens when we think of how angry we are instead of thinking of solutions to a problem. Yeah, I admit it, we both over reacted, and i know i was being imature as well, so it's all settled.
I agree with post 7. In response to post 11, if it is immature for people to talk about what bothers them on public boards, you must also be immature, based on the contents of your post in the context of the final paragraph of it. Personally I don't think its immature for people to publish thoughts about what bothers them on public forums or elsewhere on the internet. I think people being able to talk about what bothers them, being able to set the agenda, is one of the greatest liberations of the digital age. No more does what the world discusses have to be determined by the traditional media. Now, we the people can put something on the internet about what bothers us instead of what bothers the media and politicians, and other people can discuss it. That was not an immature development.
Raymond, the way I see it, the advice you give other people is like a gift. They are not obliged to accept it, let alone take it seriously and follow it. It is certainly not your right to be thanked for your advice and to have your advice turned into action. Besides, isn't it somewhat arrogant to assume that you are necessarily right, and in a position to tell this person what she should do with her life, and to fully expect that she will do as you tell her to do?
Some people give advice for various reasons. One will never know the true intention of most people when they speak to you.
However, speaking about things and attempting to resolve them is of utmost importance.
Remember that we are all interconnected; we affect one another, regardless of what we think but, hell, most people already said on here what I wanted to say.
I agree most certainly with post 18. Wise words, Susanne.
I, personally, that is, would take offence if someone that I deem as a friend, do not tell me what they have on their heart or mind but, rather share it with the rest of the world without talking to me. That, in my opinion, is just lame.
Anyway, I hope both of you learnt something from this.